Archive for October, 2008

(adapted from my “Get What You Want” 10/14 ezine issue) 

The fact that my boyfriend doesn’t vote – at all – never has – even in this historic election – is not just embarrasing but astounding as well as completely contrary to what I was taught by my veteran father political research colleagues. 
 
Voting is simply what we do.  It’s not optional in my world, so I was shocked to learn my sweetie doesn’t exercise that privilege!

In fact, I was shocked not only that he doesn’t vote, but that he ADMITS it!  To his blogging girlfriend!  (Isn’t that alone reason enough to get out and do it?)
 
But I got off my high horse about it when I realized I might not be using my own vote as powerfully as I thought.
 
Because there’s a difference – sometimes a dramatic difference – between the vote that goes on the ballot and the one logged by Universe.
 
For example, I have to admit I’ve been to the polls before not so much to cast a ballot in favor of one candidate or issue, as in opposition to another.
 
Ever done that?
 
If so, and if you’re law of attraction-savvy, you know you actually added power to the very candidate or position you were against.  That’s how it works.  (That “resist, persist” thing, you know.)
 
We’re well trained in our deliberate creation studies to focus on what we want instead of what we don’t want, but I can’t say I always practiced that in the voting booth!
 
Which is why I realize my sweetie may have offered a more positive contribution with his complacent absence at the polls than I have by doggedly casting a strongly-opinioned vote.  If I’ve got attention on what I don’t want, I’m just adding more power to that no matter what it might say on the ballot.
 
That’s not to say I recommend abstinence from voting, but I HIGHLY recommend we all be more aware of how we cast our vibrational vote.  Which is all that matters anyway – the vibration!
 
If I march out on November 4th to vote against what I perceive as reckless and dangerous leadership, I actually add energy to the very thing (or candidate) I don’t want.  On the other hand, when I cast my ballot in favor of what I see as a step in the right direction, I help create that outcome.  ‘Cause I get what I vibrate.
 
Make sense?
 
So not just this election day – but every day – ensure you direct thoughts in a way that supports what you want, which simply means focusing on it rather than its opposite.
 
Although I know some politicians give us great material for getting derailed on that, consider it good practice to get even more deliberate in how we cast our vibrational vote.

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When you tap into this, everything will begin working for you! You will be in the flow. 

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My ex hubby called to share his success story in manifesting an amazing night with a beautiful young lady in Nashville last week.  He’s new to law of attraction, and isn’t exactly in the habit of picking up girls - so this was out of his ordinary.

He created it by first recognizing the desire - “I want to have dinner with a beautiful girl.”  Then he stated it out loud: “I am dining with a fun beautiful girl tonight.” 

Then he “acted as if.”  He saw the Godiva chocolate store in the hotel, went in for raspberry truffles for his as of yet nonexistent dinner date, which is when a beautiful young fun girl nudged him in the back of the knees to get his attention. 

Hours later after a whirlwind of dining, dancing and (probably) some drinking, he was back in his own hotel room at 4 am.  He was quite proud of himself, and I admit, I am too.

As we were laughing about his first deliberate creation success, he said “I knew if anyone would appreciate this story it was you.”  Ha!  I like being the kind of ex-wife who can delight in hearing her former husband romance another woman. 

I asked if I could blog about it.  He said, “Sure, but don’t call me your ex.”  He hates that term. 

But it’s practically a term of endearment for me.  I think it’s a fortunate man who makes it to my ex list.  He’ll get more love as an ex than most men do as a husband or boyfriend.  (Slight exaggeration, perhaps.)

What’s even more cool is when I get hired to help others accomplish this same thing.  They want to relinquish the traditional experience of divorce or breakup and instead create a fulfilling friendly relationship with a former spouse or partner.  Certainly that’s using our power for good, right?!  (Or maybe that’s still up for debate as per our last post!)

Some folks assume I’m friends with exes because I ended the relationships.  They say, “It’s easy for YOU because you’re not the one getting left behind.”

Well that’s just not true.

In fact, the times when I was the dumpee (vs. dumper) were my best chances for ongoing friendships – since if it’s me initiating departure, their ego seems to have a harder time thinking nice thoughts about me.  (The other impediments generally include new girlfriends/wives.)

But how I got to be such good friends with the only man I’ve ever said “I do” to was not what you might expect.

I credit it to the night he walked out of the house looking like a million bucks and smelling even better (on our date night, no less, which we’d implemented when the marriage road got bumpy) and he said, “I’m going to do what I have to do to be happy; you should do the same.” 

Well, I knew exactly what that meant!  There was no talking about it; his mind was made up.  He was gone.

And I cried.  And cried.  All night long.  And felt betrayed.  And abandoned.  And rejected.  And scared.  And angry.  And a failure.  And alone.

All of it.  It was quite the solo pity party!

And the next morning, I was done with it.  I was done being sad and feeling depressed.  I had traveled that road to the end.

The next day I bounced off to work with a spring in my step.  (For real – not faking!)  All the bad feelings were done and gone.  ?!  Sounds bizarre, I know. 

I was still getting divorced, obviously; I still had a husband who (apparently) didn’t want me, and who (apparently) wanted other women, but that wasn’t going to ruin my life or even one more day.

As I waited at the bus stop I heard someone approach from behind and I called out “Good morning!” in the most sincere singsong voice I’d heard from myself in a very long time.

That was the beginning of my friendly divorce and becoming even better friends with my ex.  I attribute much of it to “feeling all the feelings” and letting them process right on through.  Not getting stuck in them, just letting them come – and go.

(It maybe also helped that the person I called out a cheery “Good morning” to at the bus stop turned out to be super handsome.  There is definitely life after love, huh, Cher?  hee hee)

This is what I mean when I say this place is crawling with fabulous people.  They’re right under our noses when we just look for them – whether they’re the ones we’re married to, divorced of, or waiting for the bus with.  That doesn’t mean we have to make something work with a person we’ve grown apart from, but it also doesn’t mean we have to cut off the love in order to move on.

After all, we live in an “AND” Universe.  We can have our cake AND eat it, too. 

What does that look like in terms of relationships?  Where have we limited ourselves as to what we believe is possible?

I see an opportunity right under my own roof right now, and will have fun bringing more AND into my current love life.  The same way I’ve learned how to work less AND enjoy more money; to work out less AND be more fit; I intend to bring more ANDness to my relationship with Russ.

The food for thought here includes manifesting by acting as if (way to go, Kev!), “feeling the feelings” as part of the allowing process, finding ways to feel better (handsome men at bus stops!), dropping conventions about how it’s “supposed” to look (divorce=ugly), and being willing to let more of the good stuff in. 

I’d love to hear your thoughts about relationships and their evolution, as well as your range of experiences in deliberate and maybe not-so-deliberate creation of them  … ?

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by Eva Gregory, CPCC

Have you achieved the level of success that you desire?

If the success that you envision has been elusive, perhaps the answer is not your goal, but your thoughts pertaining to your goal. One cannot achieve success without being committed to the task at hand … no matter what the goal is. Without commitment one’s ideas lack direction due to the inability to fully develop a strong path to follow, and ambitions never come to possess the burning desire that makes them a ‘have to’ instead of a ‘maybe’ or ‘perhaps’. Commitment is the thing that gets us out on the water and puts wind in our sails so that we can successfully navigate around whatever obstacles that may surface. It puts us in the driver seat and sets us up for continued success. There is something addictive about setting your sights on a goal, working hard, and achieving the desired outcome. Commitment is the catalyst that produces concrete results.

But like everything else there are levels of commitment, and one-hundred percent commitment is necessary for real success. Anything less leaves room for vacillation which will eventually bring all forward progress to a standstill. Or worse, a lack of commitment could stop you from even starting a task. Jamie experienced the latter scenario first hand, and did not realize it until he had wasted a great deal of time and money.





Jamie had been thinking of expanding his business for the last six months. He read countless books, purchased new software, hired a new site designer, and lined up advertising. But no matter what he tried to implement, he was not achieving the expected results. After several weeks of this he sat down with his brother to try to isolate the difficulty. At the end of a lengthy discussion the brothers determined that the source of Jamie’s problems was not what he was doing, but the fact that he was doing something that he really hadn’t committed to. While he had taken the steps to expand his business, his heart wasn’t in it because he hadn’t been listening to his inner voice. His inner voice had been telling him that instead of adding more services, he should be finding and developing a niche for himself. When Jamie analyzed the situation, he stopped ignoring his inner voice and put a plan into action to develop the idea of finding his niche. Something he could really commit to! Within several weeks of recognizing his blocker he discovered a niche that he loved, was able to write awesome copy for his new website, and had the desire to learn the new software that had been sitting on his desk unopened. After months of spinning his wheels, a little insight and a commitment to following his passions has put Jamie on track for success.





Most important is the realization that when we commit to a task we are making a pledge to ourselves that should not be broken. People hesitate to break promises to others for fear of disappointment, well when half-hearted commitments to goals are made it’s like breaking a promise to self. Should you treat yourself any differently than you would treat others? Repeated broken promises to others can create distrust and resentment. When multiple occurrences of lack of commitment to self-important goals take place, the result is distrust in one’s ability and a poor self-esteem. Two things that should clearly not be sent out into the universe since like attracts like. Commitment is a gift, a pledge, a show of character and it should be thought of as an honor. It is an honor to ourselves for our ability to stand firm and follow through no matter what, and an honor to be bestowed on others … the precious gift of a promise to deliver the very best. In either case you have the makings of success.

Turbocharge The Law of Attraction in Your LIfe!

To the degree you are in the state of well being, you are in the flow of life and you activate the Law of Attraction.

The closer you are to a state of well being, the quicker you will attract that which you desire, be it love, wealth, health, a new home, a rewarding career, spiritual connection, and so on. This is the basis of the Law of Attraction. This IS the missing piece in The Secret.

Why is this so? And, more importantly, how do you raise your level of being to that of ‘well being’ in order to empower and speed up your manifestation process?

The Importance of ‘Being’ in Well-Being

In the book, The Secret, it is stated that your dominate thoughts attract what is coming to you in your life. Through visualizing and purposely thinking about what you desire, you set the Law of Attraction in motion. Think about wealth and you will attract wealth, for example. However, later in the book it is pointed out by Michael Beckwith and Jack Canfield, that thoughts alone are only part of the picture. In order to use the Law of Attraction, you must also FEEL abundant, or loving. They acknowledge that in addition to aligning your thoughts to that you wish to manifest, you must also align positive feelings with it. To put the Laws of Attraction into action, not only must you think or visualize what you desire, you must feel it.

In The Secret, Jack Canfield puts it this way, “A lot of people think, “If I think positive thoughts, or if I visualize having what I want, that will be enough.” But if you’re doing that and still not feeling abundant, or feeling loving or joyful, then it doesn’t create the power of the attraction”.(Byrne PG 85)

Don’t overlook aligned actions

Another step that is often overlooked is aligned actions. To create your reality in accordance to your desires, you need to think aligned thoughts, feel aligned feelings, and take aligned actions. So, for example, say you wish to create wealth. You will want to think wealthy thoughts (perhaps visualize yourself in wealth), feel what it will feel like to have the wealth, and then take actions that would take if wealthy.In simple terms, it is about alignment. All aspects of who you are must be aligned to your desire. But wait, we have left out the most important aspect of who you are, your beingness. This critical piece is the piece that is often overlooked in The Secret. Not only must your thoughts, pictures (visualizations), and feelings be in alignment to your desire, your entire being must be aligned to activate the Law of Attraction. In other words, not only must you think and feel what you desire.

You must BE what you desire.

Beingness is defined in the dictionary as one’s essential nature. It is who you are at your essence. This is sometimes referred to as your Essential Self. Who you are at this level of self is naturally, love, abundance, peace, and happiness. So, to be abundant, you must literally BE abundance, which is naturally what you are at your level of being. If you want a loving relationship, you must BE love, which is also what you are at your level of being.

When you live from the level of your essential nature, you can’t help but to continually attract good things into your life. This is because your essential nature is love, abundance, peace, bliss, joy, happiness – all in unending supply. The Law of Attraction must respond to this accordingly. It is the Law of the Universe.

In the beginning of this article, I promised I would talk about how to move into the state of Well Being. You can see how living from your level of being is really what well-being is all about. When you are living from being, you can’t help but feel good. Feeling well is your natural state of being.

The question is then, how do you live from your natural state of being. The easiest way to move into your state of being is to let go of anything that is not your state of being. Negative, charged emotions, for example, are in opposition to your natural being. Your beingness is free flowing, always moving along in the flow of the universe, sometimes called universal flow. If you have resistances to anything in your life, you stop your flow, and move into opposition to your natural state of being, your Essential Self.

To release anything, the first step is to welcome it in and allow it. If someone at your workplace brings up emotional charges, for example, simply allow the charges to come up. Allow them to have space in your awareness, even if temporary. When they are up the next step is to release them and let them go. This is actually easier than it seems. The process is – welcome and allow whatever is there (e.g. resistance, fear, negativity, someone or something in your life that causes you stress), and then gently release and let go.

Do the above process in various arenas in your life that may be causing you stress or worry. As you do so, you become more free and naturally move into beingness, your Essential Self. The more you live from your beingness, that is naturally, love, abundance, peace, happiness, and so on, the more the Law of Attraction must bring corresponding good things into your life.

Using universal laws, such as the Law of Attraction is not always easy, but it is simple. You can quicken the process using tools such as the Golden Flow System. If you would like a free recording of an actual Golden Flow process, simply click on the link below, or go to http://golden-flow-system.com .
You CAN have it all. You are MEANT to. Why not live from your natural state of happiness, love, health and abundance? Simply allow and release and you will move into the beautiful state of beingness. Then simply enjoy allowing the Law of Attraction go to work for you.