Archive for April, 2010

By Christine Kloser

Have you ever been 100% certain that a situation really was exactly what you thought it was; only to find out later you were completely wrong? The truth is things aren’t always what they appear to be. Often when you’re totally convinced that a certain thing is true, you end up finding out it’s not true at all.

I recently met an incredible singer/songwriter, Tiamo, at an event with Christian Mickelson and his song “Universe” speaks directly to this experience. Here are the opening lyrics to his song…

“I had a conversation with the Universe late last night.
It told me that the things I think are wrong always turn out right.
Cause blessings often come to parties uninvited in disguise.
So when you get the door, it’s always best to have an open mind.

Because I believe that everything has Divine reasoning,
and I believe that everything has deeper meaning.”
~Tiamo

The truth is that everything does have a deeper meaning. Underneath every supposed challenge or struggle, something deeper is happening.

I’m sure if you take a moment right now to think about a challenging time in your life, you can look beyond the challenge to see the gifts from that experience. Hindsight is always 20/20.

So, are there situations appearing in your life or your business right now that appear to be “true” for you, and are causing you to contract, rather than expand? Perhaps you’re struggling with financial, emotional, relationship or health challenges and you are only seeing what they are at the surface.

I invite you to look deeper at these issues and look for the gift(s) they are here to bring. -What if the financial challenge you’re facing is here to teach you about and bring you abundance?

What if the personal issue you’re facing is here to help you to believe in and love yourself?
What if the relationship issue you’re facing is showing up to mirror back to you the places you need to heal?
What if the health issue you’re facing is surfacing for you to learn to take care of yourself and receive love and support in your life?
What if…
The only way I’ve managed to gracefully move through the challenges I’ve faced (and continue to face) is my commitment to looking beneath apparent circumstances to find the deeper meaning. This is what I hope for you as you journey through your life and business.

You’re always going to be thrown curve balls, especially as an entrepreneur. Your soul signed up for this journey! The truth underneath everything is that you are never given more than you can handle; the Universe is indeed conspiring for your highest good, always… including right now!

So, let go of your grip on what appears to be true in your life, and dig underneath it to see what’s really true. Chances are you will discover a gift that’s been waiting for you. It’s time to unwrap that gift and receive it!

NOTE: If you want to listen to Tiamo’s song “Universe” or view the lyrics, just go to http://www.tiamomusic.com/music.html.

© 2010 Christine Kloser

Would you like to use this article? You may as long as you include the following information along with the article: Christine Kloser is the award-winning author of The Freedom Formula and Conscious Entrepreneurs. She is widely recognized as an expert in the field of conscious entrepreneurship having spoken alongside such luminaries as Neale Donald Walsch, Dr. Joe Vitale, Arielle Ford, James Twyman and Marianne Williamson. Christine works with entrepreneurs to embrace a new paradigm of success… helping them experience true freedom and fulfillment in their life and their business. Get a F R E E chapter of her award-winning book, The Freedom Formula at www.thefreedomformula.com/freechapter.

Five weeks ago my live-in boyfriend of almost four years ended our relationship in one short and heated discussion. 

Some of you heard me commit to having this breakup in the vortex, so I thought you were due for an update as to how that’s working out.

Quick backstory: last month Russ said he’d had enough, was crystal clear about what he wanted, and if I wasn’t prepared to make immediate and significant change (which meant limits on a friendship with an ex-beau), then we were done.

(My friendships aren’t optional – even, maybe especially, ones with ex-boyfriends.)

So we were done. 

Just like that. 

While reeling from the shock of this surprise turn of events, I turned to my cohorts in creation and committed to having the best breakup I’d ever had.  A breakup in the vortex (ala Abraham).

I’ve never had one of those (a fun, enjoyable, loving breakup?) - so I didn’t know exactly what it would be like or how to go about creating it …

… but I did know from the anger, resentment and fear that was bubbling up that I needed to get very deliberate about what I chose to feel through all this.  Or I could easily get swept up in the typical routine of what we expect a breakup to be.

So in to the vortex I headed.

That trip in started with being really upset, primarily with his idiocy, some other name-calling (in my own mind and to a compassionate girlfriend or two), and a healthy round of blame.

That might not sound like vortex material, but it was an enormous step up from the initial despair and powerlessness I felt in the first red hot moment.

So with the feeling-better momentum in place (even if it came from bad-mouthing and imagining his deep regret about making such a stupid move), I swiftly moved on to disappointment and then worked my way up to acceptance. 

(When I say swiftly, I mean a couple of days.  This didn’t happen on a dime exactly.)

And get this: after being willing to fully feel all the not-so-nice stuff, I got beautiful access to the higher vibrations!  (It always surprises me how well that turns out!)

After being willing to feel scared and mad and all that other non-fun stuff, it gave me freedom from being stuck there.  Super cool how that worked.

In that space, I had the presence of mind to remember that  big change can only mean one thing – good things coming! 

Life only gets better, so to have a big shakeup like this must mean life would get even better than before.  And I thought it was pretty good to start with, so this would be interesting to see how Universe could top it!

I had no idea what “better than before” might look like – a new house?  A new man?  A new focus on me, or maybe my work?  This house to myself?  More cats??  I didn’t know.

I couldn’t see the end result, but I reiterated to myself that it’s only going to get better. 

And I knew that would work best if I could flow some surrender and acceptance, rather than resistance.

So I got okay with it. 

In fact, after a little bit of practice with the better-feeling thoughts, I started to be excited about what would happen next! 

I actually woke up one morning, you know that moment of instant recall once you’re awake again and the flood of realization comes back about what’s happening in life – yeah, at that moment this thought spontaneously popped in, “I love my life!”

To naturally come up with that thought in the midst of an uninitiated and unwanted breakup?  I knew I was in the vortex!

Which made it easier to appreciate all that was present in my life – not knowing whether I’d be with any of it next week even.  

I soaked up the good stuff now: waking up in this fabulous bed, hearing those beautiful birds outside, seeing his ridiculous Frosted Flakes in the pantry, picking up his mail from the mailbox, dating a first rate golfer (surely that wouldn’t happen again!), admiring this gorgeous backyard, talking to him about the vote on Survivor that he missed, even something as simple as saying goodnight.

All the stuff I’d been taking for granted!  Sure I appreciated it, but not like I was NOW.  Now that I realized it might not be here tomorrow.

I mentally traced back the path to how I got here, those early dates in the beginning, what a breath of fresh air he was.  His traits of being so practical and thinking ahead and smelling so good.  And the frustrations, too!  I could even enjoy those now that I knew they wouldn’t be in my future.  No more not letting dogs on the people couch – ha!  No more over-trimming of the lawn.  Ahhhh.

It was a lot of enjoyment packed in those days. 

Not to mention a tremendous amount of love and support coming from facebook friends and GVU compadres.  That was a LOT of love you guys sent!

So here I was dripping in love at a time when – normally – one would expect to be fired up with quite the opposite feelings.

It was quite vortexy!

I emailed Russ a sweet and heartfelt note about how I imagined he might be having a rough day, because even though all this was his idea I knew it wasn’t easy for him.  I told him how much I admired his courage to do what was in his heart, and how grateful I was that he honored what mattered to him, even when I didn’t agree with it.  

And I shared my confidence that good things were in store for both of us.

I even imagined in writing to him how his next partner would be so much more what he wanted.  I could genuinely enjoy the thoughts of him being happy with someone else, especially knowing life would get better for me, too.  However that might look!

So when he brusquely asked me to stop writing him and stay out of his way until we got into separate houses, I respected his request.  I knew his way of breaking up was different than mine, and I easily accommodated his request by laying low.  I stopped sending notes and did my best to not be home when he was. 

I was turning out to be a really good ex-live-in-girlfriend!

After a few days of this, Russ sent a note (when he couldn’t reach me by phone) saying he realized he had complained about things that seemed trivial now, that we had a good life together he had taken for granted, and that he hoped there was a road back for us. 

My rather rigid response was that there was no going back, our breakup was official (it was on facebook after all) and that I wasn’t interested in “going backwards.” 

He suggested that instead of going back to how things were he was committed to moving forward to join me where I was.  In this place of love and appreciation and commitment to feeling good.

Holy hannah – he’s joining me in the vortex?!

Sure enough, that’s what the last month has been.  And continued to be once I dropped my resistance-filled “rules” about how I conduct relationships with exes.

This union is now better than it ever was – even though we’re technically “exes” – it got even better than it was before.  In too many ways to count.  (If this post weren’t already this long, I’d attempt to count some of those ways.)

Although there is one very surprising and interesting side effect I will mention from this vortex breakup: I have never had less interest in other men ever before in my entire life. 

Like, I would have expected that in having a new ex I’d feel quite single and open to possibilities – “available” in some sense – since I wasn’t in a committed relationship. 

And yet, the opposite has happened.  I couldn’t have less interest in other men.  That surprises me.

I’m feeling a level of commitment in a supposed uncommitted relationship that I definitely didn’t expect.

So I’m having the best time ever with my newest ex-boyfriend, and looking forward to more of it.  Although I know that if he changes his mind tomorrow, I know how to handle that situation quite nicely.  (Been there, done that.) 

Universe delivered exactly what I expected in a way I didn’t anticipate.  Big change ushering in even better stuff.  From my personal experience I will say that breakups in the vortex are not to be missed! 

This post isn’t done, though, until I give due credit to those of you who flooded my world with feelings of love and support.  Seriously, a girl couldn’t have a bad breakup when she’s in the midst of that sea of love!  Thanks, all.

Related posts:

1. Abraham’s Vortex
2. Ventures Out of the Vortex
3. Switching the Dial

So I got sucked into the movie Castaway with Tom Hanks the other night.  I had forgotten what a great movie it is.  For those who haven’t seen it, basically he gets into a plane crash and gets washed up alive on a deserted island.  Most of the movie is just him on this island and how he survives for over 4 years there and eventually makes it back home.  He says something at the end of the movie (once he’s back home) that I think is so powerful.  Here’s the quote:

“We both had done the math. Kelly added it all up and… knew she had to let me go. I added it up, and knew that I had… lost her. ‘cos I was never gonna get off that island. I was gonna die there, totally alone. I was gonna get sick, or get injured or something. The only choice I had, the only thing I could control was when, and how, and where it was going to happen. So… I made a rope and I went up to the summit, to hang myself. I had to test it, you know? Of course. You know me. And the weight of the log, snapped the limb of the tree, so I-I – , I couldn’t even kill myself the way I wanted to. I had power over *nothing*. And that’s when this feeling came over me like a warm blanket. I knew, somehow, that I had to stay alive. Somehow. I had to keep breathing. Even though there was no reason to hope. And all my logic said that I would never see this place again. So that’s what I did. I stayed alive. I kept breathing. And one day my logic was proven all wrong because the tide came in, and gave me a sail. And now, here I am. I’m back. In Memphis, talking to you. I have ice in my glass… And I’ve lost her all over again. I’m so sad that I don’t have Kelly. But I’m so grateful that she was with me on that island. And I know what I have to do now. I gotta keep breathing. Because tomorrow the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring?”

Sometimes we can feel so hopeless, and all your logic may be telling you you’re completely screwed but if you just keep breathing, if you just keep living in the breath, and stay, at the very, very least, neutral (not positive or negative), you never know what will open up for you.

According to the Accurate and Reliable Dictionary (compared to all those phony, unreliable ones), hope is defined as a desire of some good, accompanied with an expectation of obtaining it, or a belief that it is obtainable; an expectation of something which is thought to be desirable; confidence; pleasing expectancy. 

Next time you feel like you have no control, or you’re just feeling really lousy, whatever you do, don’t give up hope because you never know what the tide will bring!